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[discountlan]

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	» Age: 33 » Species: Human » A5 Card: Open » Seeking:A Way To Help Jin Guangyao » Preferences: Strong Warriors, Talented Soldiers, People Who Hate Gusu Lan Sect, People Who Know That A Family Name Is Not As Important As A Persons Earned Talent And Who Also Likes To Take Down Corrupt Overbearingly Archaic Cultural Systems » Interests: Jin Guangyao, Playing The Guqin, Jin Guangyao, Practicing New Cultivation Methods, Jin Guangyao, Creating And Improving Upon Cultivation Spells, Jin Guangyao, Teaching And Training Cultivation Methoods, Jin Guangyao, Lan Wangji, Jin Guangyao » Bio: Who is this dude? Truthfully no one knows. But supposedly he's a sad sad little man who doesn't know how to let things go. He was picked on a lot as a kid and because of it he's now that one guy that feels like he has everything to prove as an adult. Senpai didn't notice him, in fact, senpai refuses to acknowledge him. So he got a new senpai. He will do anything for him. Oh? And supposedly he made a sect of his own to spite everyone? Who knows. But he knows how to teleport really well and something about having a lot of holes? That's sure to come in handy.
	base code by photosynthesis
	Su She

Comments

[taintedpeony]

Minshan. How else am I supposed to respond? It is of course easier for me to focus on your struggle than my own.


Of course, I am speaking about it callously. If I think about what I had to do here, to survive, for what I thought I wanted, for what I thought they wanted of me... I will start crying again. [His voice was hoarse now. Of course, it was traumatic.]

I made myself do things, and even when I was with someone I had loved back then... I found myself leaving my body while it was happening. They even told me that they regretted sleeping with me and I regret sleeping with them too. So much. It hurts even more that I loved them. That if I can just be a good little whore for them that maybe they would love me.

This place broke me in a different way than the cultivation world did.

All I am trying to do is build up a person who can survive here, who can try and learn to be happy.

Minshan this is the only life we can have now.

Now...I have a cultivation partner now and sex feels good with them, but the truth is we are both coming from places where sex had brought up a lot of pain. I love them a lot. But we have so much work to do.

I'm sorry Minshan I really am. I am trying so hard here.

[discountlan]

Ziyao...

[The pain in Su She's voice only grew deeper. Oh, how he wished he was there to console Ziyao. As good as it was to hear his voice, he more so wished he could wrap his arms around the other man and protect him from all the horrible things life kept throwing his way.

He was glad that his friend had finally managed to find some peace with it all in his own way. But that still didn't save Ziyao from the pain of the experience.

Su She was so tired of seeing his friend having to endure all that.]

Why are you apologizing for something that others did to you? Aren't you the one always telling me to stop letting people get away with the pain they inflict? Aren't you the one who taught me to stand up and fight for myself finally? Don't be a hypocrite to your own advice, my friend.

[He hated being so hard on Ziyao, especially with how he knew he was ailing. It painted him. But this was some hard love that needed to be given.]

Ziyao. You are my friend, and I love you desperately, and it is because of that, I worry. Stop projecting your concerns onto me to distract from when you should be taking care of yourself.